Life is full of laundry lists of things that are recommended for your well-being, and I’m sure sometimes it feels like your pediatrician’s advice about what is best for your child’s health just adds more things to that already overwhelming list. Parenting is hard. Perfection is impossible. So in the interest of full disclosure, here’s just some of the things that I have advised as a pediatrician but haven’t done for my child.
Brush teeth. Cavities are the most common chronic health disease in children. Experts recommend starting to brush your child’s teeth as soon as they emerge. My daughter has 3 (and a half) teeth right now, and I have not started brushing them. I told myself when she turned one I would start. That was 10 days ago from the time I’m writing this. I have bought her a toothbrush but haven’t yet started brushing….
Limit screen time. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends very little screen time for babies and young children as it is not developmentally appropriate engagement. I watch a lot of sports so the TV is on all day most weekends during football season and many nights for basketball games. There are plenty of days where my daughter is exposed to hours of screen time because of this. I also scroll my phone endlessly while feeding her or trying to put her to sleep.
Supplemental Vitamin D drops. Breast milk does not have enough Vitamin D for babies so it is recommended to give babies Vitamin D drops every day if breast milk is their predominant milk source. Realistically my daughter probably got it a handful of times a month. I tried a few strategies to help me remember, but it just never happened consistently.
Read to your baby every day. Start early. Reading books to babies as young as a few weeks old can improve developmental outcomes in the future. It’s an excellent development and bonding tool. I always envisioned I’d read books every night to my daughter, but she had zero interest in having a book read to her. She would often cry when we tried it in her first few months, and once she became mobile she hasn’t stopped moving – so sitting down to read a book was out of the question. I haven’t had the energy or patience to be more persistent about trying to foster her love of reading. Every few days now she will sit still to read a book or two so maybe we are getting somewhere…
Babies don’t need that much stuff. This one isn’t necessarily about health or any official recommendation, but I have often told families that the marketing for baby products preys hard on parents and most of it you don’t need. Well, I myself have fallen into the trap. During her first year of life I am certain I was single handedly keeping Amazon alive. Does she actually play with most of the toys I bought her? Not really. Instead trash, containers, and the TV remote are her favorites day in and day out.
Put your baby down drowsy but awake. I should do a whole post on sleep, because my thoughts on it have changed drastically since having a child. As long as your sleep choices are safe for your baby, I think there are many different ways to approach sleep and all are okay. It does make sense to me though that it’s a good idea for children to learn how to fall asleep on their own so the adage of putting them down drowsy but awake seems smart. At present I rock my daughter to sleep every night and don’t see that changing anytime soon. I enjoy those moments and it’s much easier than listening to her cry each evening so for now I’m sticking with it.
On the flip side – the things that have been non-negotiables in my house. This post would feel incomplete to me if I didn’t also include the things that I do my best to adhere to without exceptions. Most have to do with safety. I would encourage every parent to prioritize these as well:
- Safe sleep: Babies should be on their back in their own sleeping space with a firm mattress and no loose objects. Everyone who may put my daughter to sleep has heard me talk about this many times.
- Car seat safety: Car seats need to be installed and used correctly every time. You should read both the car seat and your vehicle’s instruction manual.
- Water safety: Never leave a child alone near water, home pools must be secure.
- Eating safety : Avoid situations or foods that are high risk for choking.
- Vaccinations: My daughter will always get every vaccine recommended by experts and the American Academy of Pediatrics; they save lives.
Hopefully after reading this you can cut yourself some slack next time you don’t follow your pediatrician’s advice 🙂 Some things are easier said than done, and it’s okay for every parent to decide what to prioritize and what to let go.